


The Koala and The Leaning Tower

by Vicemir



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Character Development, Drama, Hurt/Comfort, I added this tag because he is really whipped for Jinhwan sorry, Inspired by Roleplay/Roleplay Adaptation, Jinhwan is Koala, Jinhwan is an architector, Jinhwan is religious, Junhoe is Whipped, Junhoe is a dramaqueen sometimes as usual, Junhoe is a questroom administrator, Junhoe is the Leaning Tower, M/M, Temporarily Unrequited Love, relantionship development, romantic fluff is here as well as something hot, soft, they are fools but they are trying their best
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-25
Updated: 2017-12-06
Packaged: 2019-01-05 07:36:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12185727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vicemir/pseuds/Vicemir
Summary: What should you do when your girlfriend dumped you for another guy? That's right, take revenge. Take revenge the most smart and cruel way. Make her new boyfriend dump her for you.





	1. [3, 2, 1, fight] Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is the translation of roleplay episodes. All episodes make up one timeline and one story.=)
> 
> [july 2017]  
> «What should you do when your girlfriend dumped you for another guy? That's right, take revenge. Take revenge the most smart and cruel way. Make her new boyfriend dump her for you».
> 
> hyung – older guy  
> dongsaeng – younger guy  
> noona – older girl

Kim Jinhwan, _again_ , was looking at Junhoe like he was nothing but an empty place. He nodded politely, they warmly chatted for a while (not like complete strangers on the street but not as close friends as well), and Junhoe hurried with disappointment to where Jinhwan came from, Architecture Company A. He was having a lunch break on his work and he needed to see his dad, who was the president of the stated company.

  
Okay, maybe calling warm open look, that he hungrily catched from Jinhwan-hyung, an "empty space" wasn't exactly true, but as for Junhoe that has been stubbornly trying to get a proper attention from Jinhwan it wasn't much better.

  
Junhoe never knew the feeling of a unrequited love or crush before. Usually, his desision of who to date now was purely lying on choosing between those people who had a crush on Junhoe already. And it wasn't really hard, he just had to find a somewhat good-looking person who wasn't looking dumb at least outside, and make the interest mutual. Still, at the end it never gone further than some simple boring talks and make out sessions. Junhoe was tired to the death from getting phone texts every day praising him for his stunning beauty.

  
He already knew he's more than handsome, alright? And he would be a fool for not using it for his purposes.

 

But still...something was lacking in such form of "love". Yeah, he had been trying to think through his dates beforehand and make them interesting, despite of pure fear of the amusement parks; yeah, he spent time with his dates (mostly girls) on his work as well, by putting his phone near the monitor, and after work: even if there were escape games sessions booked on 11pm, Junhoe still could show up at their door with some food at night and sit outside in some sort of romantic night-date.

  
But faces changed, he had to memorize different phone numbers, addresses, and all girls were almost the same, almost no one stood out, no matter how hard Junhoe tried to remember little details he always valued in his relationship partner. However, he hasn't been seeing anyone for almost a year now, just because he started to catching himself intrusively enjoying meeting one of dad's company employees, Kim Jinhwan. Well, the fact that Jinhwan-hyung was his dad's employee didn't matter at all, they've met a long time ago and Junhoe found out about where Jinhwan's been working by accident, during one of their small talks. Also, that fact was more of an uncomfortable detail that could get in the way, than something useful, so Junhoe kept his relation to the president unspoken.

  
He enjoyed more their time together as buddies when Jinhwan would come play escape games in the questroom where Junhoe worked. And every time Jinwan showed up, Junhoe would look at him more often, would laugh loudly and smile sincerely more often (even at the smallest jokes), until he realized that he _does_ have a crush on Jinhwan.

  
Jinhwan, however, never left a note with his telephone number on his desk or in his hand, never sent him shy messages asking to go out with him. Nothing. Junhoe couldn't even figure out if they were friends or just buddies with rare mutual talks. Sometimes hyung had a flirty mood, and in days like these Junhoe's heart was pierced by particular prickly sweet feelings, absolutely new for Junhoe. Did Jinhwan flirt with him? Yes. But why then he'd immediately become restrained, taking aback if Junhoe was playing along or flirting back? And in case if Junhoe initiated some flirting, Jinhwan would never respond, taking it as a joke.

  
Junhoe was very hot tempered and he would quickly lose his mood, sulking in from annoyance. But as the new day would come, he wanted to see Jinhwan more and more.

  
Well, that's merely the point of unrequited crush, Junhoe guessed. You still don't lose your hope.

 

Junhoe has been replaying his talk with Jinhwan the whole time he met his father to bring him lunch. Probably, he even blurted out some detached answers to his ex-coworkers (he once went through the internship in the company). Junhoe was saved from being drawn into any kind of interrogation by the wide smile on his face that hid his upset look. Today, Jinhwan was cold with him more than ever. Maybe Junhoe should've stopped him when he met him outside, offer to drink black coffee together, talk, light up Jinhwan's mood? But Junhoe was so taken aback by Jinhwan's indifferent reaction to his greeting so he preferred to run away as soon as possible. And now he was returning to his worlplace in mixed feelings.

  
There were only six games until his shift would end, and Junhoe tried to pull himself together. It didn't work out good, as usual. He desperately wanted to let out a scream – let out a cry of confusion and rage, and then return back to dad's work, lie all his way to get Jinhwan's home address or at least a phone number, and end their unhappiness once and for all. But no, he couldn't, he couldn't be loud again, there's a policeman who's already glancing his way with suspicion. Junhoe froze right before the door in the questroom with the look of stiffened anger on his face. That's it. He should definitely have some fun tonight, just not to make a mess of anything going on. Junhoe was always told to control his emotions, but he could never really do that. It was easier for him to come somewhere, somewhere where people have a lot of fun and don't care about anything (a bar or a club would do) and charge himself with this energy.

  
And the opportunity showed up pretty quickly: after the second escape game some girl took him away to the corner («You said there are new games coming up this summer...tell me more about it?») and gave him a completely charming smile.

  
"You look very tense today. Do you want to relax together tonight maybe? Just to drink and have fun, nothing else"

  
Noona (and it was definitely a noona) looked up and down his torso with the meaningful look and put a folded note in his hand (probably with the phone number scribbled or a time and place to meet). Junhoe remembered this girl: he has been operator of her girl squad before, few times, and she must have played all their escape games by that time and came again. How's that Junhoe never saw her interest for him?

  
Junhoe straighten his back and put a smile. The girl made the first step, that's somewhat big but not unusual, and Junhoe's mood has been slightly lifted. Maybe he was being so antsy because he hasn't dated anyone for so long? Because he's been telling himself that he wanted to seek and get Jinhwan's feelings? Junhoe should probably settle down with their friendship, after all he's the only one who wants more than being friends. But it seemed like it would be never an option so he should seek his happiness in other places, even if he already stabbed his teeth into something he couldn't get and didn't want to let go.

  
Made a decision for his plans for tonight, Junhoe charmingly smiled back and finally looked in the girl's filled with hope and confusion from the pause eyes.

  
"I'll come"

//

 

There were a late evening, club, third glass of whiskey and melancholy mixed with frustration on his heart. Jinhwan never loved breaking relationships up with people, but some of them were so disappointing that they would make him huff from just a slightest flashback. He couldn't blame some people on anything, afar from them being involved with people that had disappointed Jinhwan. It was never easy to lose people like them, but Jinhwan knew that there will be a dead end after all, one way or another, either with some sort of scandal or a heartbreaking cold parting. It's simple, Jinhwan knew that when the person chooses another person that he wasn't in a good relationship with, it's hard to keep them good, just because the poor guy would find himself caught in the cross fire. It was just easier to Jinhwan to give up...

  
Time flew, fourth glass of whiskey, and Jinhwan has been staring at one of the tables and nervously clanching his fists.

  
Junhoe, nice and somehow charming guy, weird as inside as he is outside, who Jinhwan has been enjoying talking to here and there, like good acquaintances, not much more, has been sitting at the opposite side of the club at the table with his ex-girlfriend. It would be alright though; if only they broke up on good conditions and not painful as it was. Jinhwan shivered at the memory of the plenty of rude words he had to listen from her in a public place... well, he had a reason to not to be excited seeing her. He even wondered if he was ill when they'd started dating.

  
Junhoe and Shiyeon were having fun together, Jinhwan was enough drunk already and this situation drove him wild. It's all because it was really painful and heartbreaking, his and Shiyeon's break up, and she looks like she's having the time of her life right now, unlike Jinhwan. He also remembered and couldn't get out of his head the memory of how his dongsaeng been giving him obvious signs of attraction that Jinhwan would rather react calmly or not react whatsoever. He didn't want to mess with younger's unnecessary hopes even if he saw how his eyes lit up as soon as Jinhwan would start to talk with him in his usual playful manner. Too bad Junhoe took it as a flirt, Jinhwan had to slow himself and Junhoe down so the younger won't be making up some weird thoughts and desires.

  
_Bingo._

  
The glass he held stopped right in front of his lips. Jinhwan smiled and put it back, sliding from the bar stool to the floor. One particular thought, a brilliant idea has appeared in his mind – clouded with the lot of alcohol mind. Did he want to get revenge on his ex girlfriend? No, but teach her a lesson – yes. So why don't take her new boyfriend then? Junhoe has been trying so hard to get Jinhwan's attention, he surely wouldn't mind if his wish would be fulfilled. This is amazing, it'd feel so good to do something that insane and crazy that would make everyone satisfied. His ex didn't counted.

  
It was so easy – to take a first step to that couple's direction. The second step – not so much, Jinhwan hesitantly pondered on if what he's about to do is right. Firstly, his religion was against sodomy in any way. Jinhwan never dwelled under any illusions about his sexual orientation, but he only has been dating girls up this day so he never felt that inner fracture. And now, with every step Jinhwan was closer to betray himself and everything he believed in. Secondly, if Junhow came to this club with the girl, did it mean that he finally gave up on anything he was looking for in Jinhwan? Because then what he's about to do would be a high measure of stupidity. A huge disaster.

  
_Well, I can always justify myself. I am drunk, am I not?_

  
He never did anything stupid being drunk, he usually was determined to get to his bed and not get himself into troubles, but now...Jinhwan came up to Junhoe and Shiyeon's table with quite cheerful and even almost non-tottering walk. He quickly got an annoyed look from his ex.

  
"Hey, Jinhwan, I thought I made it clear? I don't want to have anything with you. Can you please go away and not spoil my evening? If you're suddenly blind, I'm not alone"

  
"And I wasn't looking for you"

  
Of course Jinhwan could be nicer to a girl but he didn't ment to and to be honest never wanted to talk to her ever again. They have nothing to talk about anymore, even though their dates are something he would enjoy to remember later.

  
Jinhwan with a completely impassive face turned to Junhoe, doesn't avoiding his yet confused look, leaned down (one of the rarest occasions) – and kissed him on the lips, grabbing the hair on Junhoe's nape. Invasive kiss, not a gentle touch at all, it was a hot kiss with the taste of a whiskey.

  
_Forgive me Father for I have sinned._

  
Jinhwan heard the suprised and annoyed exclamation from his ex and smiled as if he won, not hurrying much to break this moment. Turned out it wasn't disqusting to kiss a guy at all. A handsome guy – especially. And to kiss a handsome guy as a part of his revenge plan to teach a lesson to a shameless girl – was hell of a satisfaction.

  
Jinhwan was still torn by what he did though. The cross under his shirt has touched his chest with the searing cold as the reminder of the sin he won't be ever forgiven.

  
Jinhwan straightened his back, looked right into Junhoe's eyes and caressesed his hair with the light smile, but seeing younger's sparks in the look made him wonder, what will come next. Jinhwan's plan was good, but he didn't include the afterward part and he could never predict Junhoe's reaction in this case. What will he do? Run into Jinhwan with hugs and kisses? Start a fight? Tell him he's a dick, tell him to fuck off and will go away? Anyway, now, his win or his loss was entirely up to this guy, who he has only seen occasionaly in the questroom, in their area and for some reason near his work, he didn't know why.

  
But Shiyeon was the first to react. She slapped Jinhwan with all the hate in her look, but didn't went further than this typically women's move: she was still in shock after what she's seen and she probably didn't know what to do. Well, Jinhwan surely would be as puzzled as she if he was on her place.

 

//

 

Song Shiyeon seemed a nice girl. Well, better than the half of girls that left their phone numbers on his work. She had smart look, she knew her value and knew what she wanted from dating Junhoe. He didn't have to "drag" her through the awkward talks (he hated awkward talks), and since he hasn't been dated anyone for so long, he was just enjoying with hidden timidity her presence, buying cocktailes for her and trying to make her laugh. It was surprisingly easy to make her laugh, despite the fact that she was a noona: to be honest he never dated an older girl before, but he really hoped it wasn't too obvious. He wanted to look confident and manly, always. However, Shiyeon seemed to be enjoying his company as well, and the evening was just great overall. Junhoe hasn't been feeling so good for quite a long time, today he threw away all those lonely evenings this year when his head was intruded by uninvited thoughts of Jinhwan.

  
Well, he thought he threw it all away.

  
"Hey, Jinhwan, I thought I made it clear? I don't want to have anything with you. Can you please go away and not spoil my evening? If you're suddenly blind, I'm not alone"

  
Shiyeon's voice suddently became stiff, cold and annoyed, and Junhoe shaked his head in confusion, trying to understand what's changed their talk. _Jinhwan?.._ He looked up.

  
It must be an alcohol that messed up his mind, if he really sees his hyung standing right near their table with an unreadable expression on his face. Jinhwan-hyung couldn't be here! Or could he?

  
"And I wasn't looking for you"

  
And the next thing could happen, seriously, only in his drunken imagination – but fingers that were desperately pulling his hair caused legible pain; unfamiliar lips that were pressed to his in an act of greed felt _real than ever_ , and in front of his wide opened eyes Junhoe saw Jinhwan close, _very close_ : his shifted to the nose bridge eyebrows and squinted from what seemed an inside fight eyes, bangs that clinged to his forehead and a mole on his cheek that Junhoe managed to catch with the side of his eye _(turns out, Jinhwan had a girly mole in a shape of heart)_ – all these details that he couldn't imagine even if he wanted but now were imprinted in the back of his mind, and Junhoe got scared he might not see them again.

  
Jinhwan pulled himself back, and Junhoe looked at him and disbelief.

  
_I made a choice to stop chasing you, and you immediately tell me that was a mistake? Have you been noticing me all that time?_

  
He felt a warm feeling of unwelcomed happiness inside his chest, but then startled as if he's been poured with some ice water: he is in the club _with the girl_ , not Jinhwan. And the pause was too long already. Junhoe... Junhoe had to do something, either way or another. And he couldn't decide which way he wanted to do.

  
But when he saw Shiyeon's face expression changed with hatred, when he saw her standing and slapping Jinhwan, Junhoe without any second thought jumped up, shielding stumbled hyung with his own hand, protecting. It was an instinctive move, but it made the situation more confusing: how does Junhoe make excuse for it? What does he want to do now and how should he cut up rough and demand answers from Jinhwan when he is literally safeguarding him from his ex's rage (seriously, what, it's his ex?!)?

  
As few tedious milliseconds flew, Junhoe realized: he doesn't really want to demand answers from Jinhwan. At least not now: hyung looked too drunk and Junhoe was desperate to know the proper reasons behind the kiss. Because shit, _shit, he has been kissed by Jinhwan_ – the guy who never gave him an attention he wanted, the guy found Junhoe and kissed him!

  
And Junhoe should say, he was never kissed like this before...Junhoe automatically licked his dry lips, still feeling the alcohol aftertaste, and looked on the participants in the incident who both froze to the ground.

  
Shiyeon was still shoked, her hand hung up somewhere in the middle air, like she couldn't believe herself he slapped Jinhwan (or maybe she was pondering on whether she should slap Junhoe as well for being kinda involved in what just happened). Jinhwan, on the other hand...

  
Jinhwan was staring at him like his whole life was depending on Junhoe. And Junhoe's heart fell deep, deep down his feet. Forever and without return ticket.

  
Astoundingly, hyung's hand was trembling, and Junhoe grabbed it by wrist, thinking they all had enough shock here. For many months he didn't have a small chance to get close to the person he had a crush on, but he pushed his temper aside for Shiyeon who, whatever she did to Jinhwan, didn't deserve this.

  
"I...um..." The word "sorry" was never an easy thing to say for Junhoe, as well as the girl's name right now. Junhoe looked from her to Jinhwan and said with the guilt that he didn't know where it came from. "I'll deal with it".

  
Junhoe dashed to the exit from the club, didn't really worry if Jinhwan managed to follow his fast walking (it wasn't hard to drag him along, as if Jinhwan was a child). Fingers were burning with the touch of the wrist in his hand.

  
Junhoe turned around the nearest corner outside, farther from any passerby, and cornered Jinhwan-hyung without any warning, pinning him to the wall and demanding answers by the most effective way: kissing him with the same level of desperation Jinhwan had shoked him in front of the girl.

  
Few seconds later, squeezing his shoulders, Junhoe took a breath, looked on bewildered guy and feverishly blurted out:

  
"Now we're even. You... even if you didn't do it because of me but because of her – don't tell me this. Please."

  
Junhoe was hoping that his voice didn't tremble so obviously and that his eyes weren't reflecting all these days in the past when he tried to get Jinhwan's mutual affection, because if Jinhwan would laugh at him right now and make everything that happened between them in the club a joke or, worse, would give him a hateful stare now that Shiyeon wasn't there, Junhoe... to be honest, Junhoe would never recover.

  
"You probably know what I will ask you now, Jinhwan-hyung. Yes? Or no?"

  
Junhoe was still pressing guy's shoulder (he wasn't such a fragile doll at the touch as he looked like), and probably this ledge on the wall he was pinning Jinhwan to was a pain for hyung's back, and because of Junhoe's tight grabbing Jinhwan had to follow him and stand up uncomfortably on his toes, but Junhoe absolutely didn't wanted to let go of him even for a second.

  
So he just stared at Jinhwan, fearing of the agonizing anticipation of Jinhwan's reaction and pulling himself together to accept whatever answer he was going to get, with the pride of Koo family.


	2. [3, 2, 1, fight] Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jinhwan is trapping himself and Junhoe is a lot happier than a normal adult should be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I added the tag "junhoe is whipped" because you guys were all saying that and I never realized that...this is true.xD

_I made a right choice. I made a right choice to trust you, Junhoe._

This thought popped up in the back of his head with some sort of prideful tone, when his dongsaeng jumped up, a little late, to protect him from the girl. There was something naive in this move, but with this step it was totally clear to Jinhwan that all this enthusiasm of the younger, when he tried to get along and more close with Jinhwan, only needed a little push from his side to blaze even brighter.

Maybe Jinhwan overdid the push, because now he saw how lit up the boy's eyes are, literally, like Junhoe was in a fever. And all it took was just one kiss...

Jinhwan pressed the back of his hand to his lips and closed his eyes for a moment, trying to recall what's just happened. He wasn't disgusted at all. It's a pity that the younger was too in shock to react to Jinhwan's mischief immediately, but now he definitely held nothing against this kiss, this craziness happening right now.

Jinhwan's cheek was burning from the slap and he wanted to pour the bucket of an ice water on himself, because he still didn't believe that what he was doing was real.

_We are all sinners... it doesn't matter if there will be one more sin on my list. I won't make it to Heaven anyway, though I'm trying..._

He and Junhoe met each other eyes, and for a few seconds Jinhwan thought the younger was literally losing his mind – maybe it's all because of the blinking twitching lighting in the nightclub. Or maybe because Junhoe always looked weird, and now, with that set of emotions...Whatever.

It all stopped mattering when he was grabbed by his hand and hauled to the exit. At that moment Jinhwan regretted (for the millionth time in his life) that he had short legs, because he almost had to run while that elephant of his dongsaeng rammed through the crowd of people making their way to the door. Without any words Jinhwan ran after him, didn't even try to say something, for the first time in his life being scared of this guy.

He didn't hit his shoulder with the corner of the building only by some miracle. They ended up in the dark backstreet, where Jinhwan could barely distinguish his sneakers on the ground, and he thought he would be beaten. Beaten hard because of his insolence, because of the spoiled evening.

He completely believed it when he was slammed up against the wall and he even squinted hard his eyes expecting the hit but he got a kiss instead. Short, chaotic and indistinct, the same as the first one and he wasn't able to react as well, because he expected something absolutely different.

The other guy's eyes were shining, indeed, like in a fever, and Jinhwan realized he will never say such things to Junhoe, he didn't want to hurt that crazy child, that's why he better shut up and say nothing. Still, he could make himself think that his michief with the kiss was made to protect Junhoe from Shiyeon so that she won't hurt him the same way she hurt Jinhwan.

He didn't knew what question Junhoe demanded answers from, though, so he was puzzled for few seconds, realizing that "yes" or "no" could be both taken in a bad way. For example as the answer that Jinhwan kissed him without any particular tender feelings, or maybe as a final and irrevocable rejection. Also the feeling of the younger's fingers pressing into his shoulders, making his back warp in pain, as well as an alcohol dizziness in his head didn't really help Jinhwan brainstorm. And standing on the tip of his toes was always entirely uncomfortable, making him feel like some sort of a dwarf again.

"Please let me go. You're hurting me."

Jinhwan tried to start as careful as he could, just not to trigger any unnecessary emotions from Junhoe. Dongsaeng was hot tempered and always acted on his emotions, that he learned from their basic talks even when Junhoe tried to look cold and cool. And seemed like Jinhwan's words have worked even though the child in front of him has obviously became upset not being answered on the spot. Maybe he thought Jinhwan was trying to avoid the conversation.

As soon as he was let go, Jinhwan sighed with relief, shrugged his shoulders trying to get rid of the back pain, but hasn't succeed. Still, the ongoing problem wasn't that, it was that he had to finally make a decision, being given a choice. Yes. Or no. What did Junhoe want to know so passionately?

Jinhwan closed his eyes for a second, thinking what would be the right thing to do and say, unconsciously licked his lips and squeezed a little the cross under the fabric of his shirt with his right palm. It was a usual thing to do, and somehow it helped him make a choice now.

"If you ask me if I... if I will date you now, then the answer is yes", he looked up on the younger guy and lowered his hand not so sure if he wanted to do something else. "And if...if you ask me whether I kissed you to make my ex-girlfriend angry, than no. I kissed you because it was you."

The last statement was a lie, like, a fifty percent lie. Because Jinhwan kissed Junhoe on the behalf of himself, just so he could satisfy his own need in revenge for the moral damage he has these days. Not because it was Junhoe and certainly not because it was Shieyon. And now he completely "caged" himself, being an idiot he is. Well, maybe dating dongsaeng wouldn't be that bad, and if Junhoe will act good and nice to him and Jinhwan will feel comfortable, then it might do.

_Answer me, my God. You call relationships with men a sin but the love – the greatest display of you on the Earth. Then what would it mean to love a man? Can I try to get the answer on the Last Judgment?_

Jinhwan with unexpected uncertainty took Junhoe's hand and met his look again, realizing that his mouth went totally dry.

_I don't feel guilty for lying to him. You can tell a white lie when you see the person being this happy._

"Did you leave something at the club?" he asked Junhoe.

Unfortunately, the answer was positive, and he had to wait a couple of minutes for him outside. He didn't wanted to go back, obviously. And after Junhoe has returned, Jinhwan took his hand once again, more confident this time, and went to the opposite side, leading the younger after him. After all, hiding in dark alleys to make out... he was too old for that. And if he talked himself into dating Junhoe, he should give them some time together today, maybe an hour more, better few hours, otherwise dongsaeng will think he was fooled, and that would make a ton of problems that Jinhwan definitely didn't need. He already had a dozen of problems in his life, like renting a room being really poor and never ending issues with the colleagues at his work.

"Are you hungry? We could go to some day-and-night ramyeon cafe"

It was really strange, to say "we" out loud, when it was Jinhwan that has always tried to avoid Junhoe's increased interest in him, and now he let him in really close, by his own initiative. Somehow having a strange feeling that dongsaeng is already closer to him than all of his ex girlfriends. It was a truth, without any exaggeration.

Jinhwan wondered why is that.

//

"Please let me go. You're hurting me."

When Junhoe heard that, he immediately recoiled and pulled back his hand like it was searing to hold Jinhwan's shoulders anymore – maybe a little too fast. It were nerves, really. He unconsciously wiped his palms on his jeans, deciding he didn't want to step back: he was pinning Jinhwan to the wall as good with his presence and staring look as he did with his hands.

Junhoe kept staring as he saw hyung go down, shrug, tilt his head to get rid of uncomfortable position, and his desperately pounding heart fell down.

_That's it? That's all you can say? You avoided my question because you are embarassed – so in fact you didn't want me do it – you don't care – oh shit why did I do it – that's unfair! – now he won't talk to me ever – I never felt better than at that moment – please don't take my hope away I'll be angry – Jinhwan-hyung, you're amazing – it's scary – you're so so close to me yet so unreachable – I must have hurt you –_

"If you asked me if I... if I will date you now, then the answer is yes".

Junhoe's eyes went wide, as he surfed up from the abyss of bewilderment and raging thoughts. Has he heard it right?

Has Kim Jinhwan really...said this?

For a moment he imagined the future he would have dating Jinhwan – not those quick talks on the street or in questroom dungeon, but real appointments, dates, long talks, tight hugs and kisses. He imagined winning flirty yet so closed heart for a thousand times already, but now his mind went blank, surrendered under the weight of unpredictable reality and unexplored yet so delightful future!

Junhoe swallowed, repeating Jinhwan's "yes" in his head and smiled widely and happy. _He kissed me because it was me. He said we will date now. We – we! – will be dating now!_

His mind forcefully skipped the second part, because something bitter inside Junhoe was whispering that it couldn't be really that, Jinhwan never really liked him that much, that there was no such coincidences and sudden kisses after being ignored for so long – but Junhoe honestly didn't give a shit. Because yes! He really liked Jinhwan-hyung and hyung finally agreed dating him, and that was all in the whole world that mattered to Junhoe.

Junhoe laughed when Jinhwan took his hand, not hiding his relief and nervousness: in that dark narrow backstreet from coctails he drank, from what happened in nightclub, his feels increased a thousand – no, a zillion– times and the happiness was piercing him through, violently threatening his young healthy heart.

"I have to go back", he said as his head unexpectedly cleared for a moment, but instead of letting go Jinhwan's hand, Junhoe grabbed and squeezed it with his second palm. "I'll be quick. Will you... wait for me?"

He was still speaking quite formal to his hyung, having a hard time changing to informal speech. Confused about how he should speak, Junhoe promised himself to think about it next time.

Now he still had to take care of one thing. His father told him to always behave like a man. To be a gentleman. To help old people, to give love back to his mom and to give honest answers.

But when he entered the club once again, Shieyon wasn't there. Secretly Junhoe was glad she wasn't. Did she... did she understand? Probably. She wasn't stupid, after all, she may have seen how Junhoe hasn't looked away from Jinhwan even for a second and he probably was smiling (he never noticed himself doing that usually and he always ended up scaring passerby away or, vice versa, attracting them).

Junhoe will text her tomorrow and will make sure they clear all misunderstandings between them. _And you think she won't give you a hard time if you straightforwardly tell her that you better date her ex? How you would even make her keep silence?_   Well, he could give her a free coupon to any escape game in other questroom. She would totally be upset but it will soothe the only date they had. Whatever, they haven't really known each other, right?..

Junhoe paid for the beverage at their table, looked at the place where he sat when Jinhwan suddenly kissed him... and let out a triumphant yell, something between a tension release and an announcement of his overwhelming happiness to the world. His yell was immediately picked up by some enthusiastic people on a dancefloor, and shocked and confused Junhoe quickly hurried up to the exit.

 

Thank god Jinhwan still was waiting for him. Junhoe thought he might have taken a chance and slipped away as he usually did when Junhoe went to far in their talks this year, but no – hyung was there, and he took his hand and led him away from the nightclub.

Junhoe wouldn't stop smiling, looking at the dark head in front of him, and almost missed a question directed at him.

"Oh! Honestly, I am not hungry right now. Like, at all. But eating ramyeon is always great!"

And eating ramyeon with Jinhwan – just unbelieveable. Well, Junhoe, despite being a kid raised in quite a rich family, loved ordering ramyeon and chicken at the work and just loved to eat a lot and good. But right now his hunger backed away, being drown in the said happiness and infinite feelings that inflamed on the coals of tiring exhausting disappointment of his love life.

He could eat twenty pots of ramyeon with Jinhwan right now.

Oh, and how many ordinary yet amazing things he is allowed to experience together with Jinhwan right now: dinners in noodle places, in restaurants, text talks on the phone _(he will have hyung's phone number!)_ , watching movies and going to quests and everything he knew Jinhwan liked!

In the sudden attack of the need to express his feelings, Junhoe took a big step and captured Jinhwan in the hug from his back. He buried his nose at the _so conveniently located_ soft crown of Jinhwan's head, smiling brightly once again and hugging miniature hyung with the wide sleeves of his jacket.

"I won't be able to touch you like that at the public place but I really wanted to tell you that I'm extremely happy right now", Junhoe inhaled the night air with the club nuances and Jinhwan's scent, pulling himself together once again. "Alright. I'm done."

He let Jinhwan go and dashed across the road to enter the cafe under the bright inviting signboard.

If he's lucky then hyung wouldn't think of him as of running away freak, but Junhoe didn't need to see his face right now. He didn't even want to see his own face right now – with that rich and indecent for an adult (well, he was an adult, he was 22!) set of emotions that were written across it, erasing his usually aloof facade. Junhoe could feel the tips of his ears going strong red and he manly covered them with his fists, entering the ramyeon place like some sort of an elephant guy with the big ears.

He just had a crush again, okay?! So what!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to separate the episode on three parts, because translating is exausting and I have a limit of words I can translate until my fingers start waltzering wrongly on a keyboard. So one more chapter for this episode, where you will find out why Junhoe is given the nickname of a Leaning Tower!


	3. [3, 2, 1, fight] Part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jinhwan feels more and more guilty. Will he ever be able to love Junhoe back?*
> 
> *Well, at least we'll know why Junhoe is The Leaning Tower.

Jinhwan probably didn't have a better expression in his dictionary than to describe Junhoe's emotions as a "puppy joy" that hasn't been leaving the younger's face since the moment when Jinhwan told him "yes". Then, it increased a dozen times when Junhoe returned from the club, whatever he did there, and saw him standing and waiting.

Well, Jinhwan surely wasn't an idiot to leave him and disappear. It would've been totally unforgivable – to make fun of person's feelings like that, to mock Junhoe who seemed to be really in love with him, strong and mercilessly, like that. Jinhwan wasn't the type to make fun of people or damage them morally, and he also knew what guilt was, and with the background of his conflict with religious beliefs it really put him in a panic mode that wouldn't let him go even for a second.

There was no chance that this overwhelming excitement of Junhoe's will end as quickly as it's risen, but this huge wave of joy from the person behind him made him sober up fast. He had to use his brains more precisely so that he won't be in risk to make a mess out of a poor whipped guy. Junhoe will make messing ups enough for both of them, because it obviously wasn't the alcohol that drove the younger's weird behaviour that night but those two kisses and one phrase Jinhwan said to him.

Seemed like it all hit his dongsaeng too hard that even Jinhwan has smiled when he was caught in Junhoe's tight, almost bear-like hug. He wasn't against such type of PDA at all. After all, if they won't be too careless and obvious, they will seem like close friends. Secondly, it was just really warmer this way – with Junhoe wrapped all around him.

_I guess it isn't so bad, dating a person much taller than me. Hugging is surely fun. And someone is being too comfortable, as far as I can tell._

He made that conclusion when Junhoe's funny ticklish yet warm breath stroked his hair. Jinhwan hasn't even tried to push him away or ask him to stop yet, he didn't need to – since the younger pulled himself together on his own as quickly as he could and dashed to the cafe they almost went in already.

"Aish, you child", Jinhwan said quetly to his back with the patience of a good hyung that will not scold his dongsaengs because of their childish behaviour.

Jinhwan shaked his head and went in after Junhoe with the smile on his lips. When he found the guy at one of the tables, he came up and gave him a little stroke between his shoulder blades. He didn't even want to do it at first, but... it's just that he needed to do it. Maybe he will reanalyze the situation they're both in when he will wake up in the morning, and will do what he should do, not because he needs to, but also because he wants to.

Unfortunately, he didn't feel like that yet.

He only felt a guilt rotating in his guts because he has lied to Junhoe, but every time he saw the look in the younger's eyes... he thought maybe lying to him wasn't a bad idea.

Maybe, eventually Jinhwan will be comfortable around Junhoe and will stop regretting everything he did till that moment.

But for now he was there, looking at different kinds of noodles and choosing what he could eat. He needed something yummy so he could stuff this evening deep into his mind.

Jinhwan's cheek was still unpleasantly burning from the slap he got. Shieyon had a heavy hand, it used to make Jinhwan laugh but now he was sure he hasn't heard the tingle in his ears only because there was a loud upbeat music playing in the nightclub.

Well, there was still one positive thing in this all – a memory of how Junhoe literally jumped up to protect him, without any second thought.

Huh, who could've thought...

"Have you chosen which one to order?"

Jinhwan'd really be happy to play a hyung and pay for them both, but he already was lucky he hasn't paid for the drinks he had in the club (since he never returned back...) and there was almost nothing in his wallet, an empty space. He should get his salary next week, it was his sad but natural state of living. Living in Seoul is expensive.

The seasoned soup with the noodles smelled so tasty that it really made Jinhwan hungry. He ordered two portions, paid with the every last money he had and returned, giving one bowl to Junhoe. Then he enthusiastically pick up and broke two sticks apart.

"Don't worry about anything, just eat", he said.

Jinhwan smiled, a bit shyly, rubbed his still red cheek, then started to shove food in himself, but quickly slowed himself down, because he realized it was making him sleepy. Late evening, after a working day, whiskey in his stomach and a hot food – yeah, pretty much everything was calling to his desire to get home, hug a pillow on his floor and sleep till the very next alarm. But Jinhwan ousted that desire away. After all, he could consider himself on a date, and it would be a shame to fall asleep on a date, when he was actually having an interesting conversation!

And surely, it would make Junhoe really upset. But Jinhwan couldn't hide his state and he rubbed his eyes, trying to make himself a bit more awake, and then made an excuse.

"Sorry, it's just an alcohol that makes me want to sleep...Also, I worked a lot today, I hope you can understand."

There was a tint of a guilt in the smile on his lips, as he put more noodles in his mouth, because, well, he still was hungry. This was that break of stereotype of "small organisms need less food", because no, Jinhwan really loved to eat. A lot.

"But if I really will look like I'm going to take a nap right now, better wake me up, okay? I don't want to become a sleepy burden on your shoulder, Junhoe".

Jinhwan smiled to Junhoe, again, and reached out to cover his hand with his own, keeping doing what he signed himself for – showing that he does care about the younger's feelings and that he's making them "mutual".

"To be honest, I realized that long time ago. That you have an interest in me, I mean. It's just... As if I was struck with lightning when I saw you and her together at the club".

He didn't know why he decided to add some frankness in their slow dinner talk. He just thought Junhoe needed it.

 

//

 

Junhoe loudly greeted the owner of the ramyeon cafe he just walked in – maybe, too loudly, all people glanced at him – and awkwarly laughed, mentally slapping himself for the caused noise. Being noisy, actually, one of the few definitions that described him in the most precise way. But the reason behind his awkwardness was totally different.

Jinhwan followed him to the table and touched Junhoe's back with his warm small palm; Junhoe's lost for words, he gazed at hyung, surprised. Jinhwan's face was still, like he did just nothing – but Junhoe felt his sleeve twitching.

Oh, so hyung was like a damn ninja. Junhoe'd never thought that Jinhwan was a fan of skinship: he usually kept himself in his personal space bubble during their unexpected talks. Even more, he seemed like he always wanted to shrink into that space bubble, make himself even smaller than he is, like he was ashamed of his height or himself and wanted to disappear completely. But why would he do that, though? Despite Junhoe cracking a few jokes about miniaturity of Jinhwan whose head barely could reach his nose, he actually thought that having a small height was a privilege.

Sometimes Junhoe even envied how small Jinhwan is. Jinhwan looked brisk, with his fine-builded frame, and he probably never let models of buildings drop on the floor because of unlucky turn in close space between tables, he probably never smashed his head on plotters that actually happened quite a lot of times with Junhoe (he never solved the mistery _how the hell he could hit himself like this_ ), when he worked as intern in his father's architecture company. That's actually why he made a decision of finding the job that would better fit him and then help his father with money from aside.

Well, maybe, being a questroom administrator wasn't really the brilliant position with a lot of income, but he still had the time to find one.

Generally, unobtrusive but significant stroke on shoulder blades from Jinhwan-hyung knocked Junhoe off his thoughts, once again this night. Not surprising at all.

"Have you chosen which one to order?"

Well, _he tried_. He tried to focus on images, titles, but no matter how hard he tried to imagine the taste of hot noodle soup in his mouth and his desire to eat it, he's got everything blurry in front of his eyes. Probably, being pressed out by more important things. Like before exam, when your brain just can't handle more information; Jinhwan, despite his small figure, managed to settle himself down in Junhoe's mind beyond retrieve and interfered his ability to think.

Like Junhoe is a one damn teenager!

Junhoe never felt more _weak_ , _addicted_ and _controlled_.

He wasn't afraid of it, though, he liked new experience.

Also, his mind was shocked more than once that night, wasn't it? So Junhoe had every fucking right to go crazy.

"This one", he poked at one of the hanging pictures randomly, not really caring about his choice anymore. "Oh, wait, hyung-nim! Oops, wait again."

He stopped, realizing that he used a really official way to address Jinhwan – the hyung he actually was on a date with! But Junhoe really did respect him, though. After seeing him in short breaks, at escape games and after listening to carefully elicited from father stories about his employees. Well, actually, Junhoe thought he wouldn't even fall for Jinhwan-hyung if hyung hadn't earned his respect at first (okay, that's doubtful, all it took is a proper look on his miniature delicate face and Junhoe could get in line with all those girls and guys who stared at Jinhwan with an affectionate gaze). Darn it.

"I just wanted to say you shouldn't have paid for me, I can pay for myself! And we're, like...dating for 15 minutes already", grumbled Junhoe, grabbing his plate and sitting at the table near the window. "I'm paying next time!"

"Don't worry about anything, just eat".

Jinhwan-hyung seemed not bothered by it at all. But Junhoe won't calm down until he proves that he's achieved something in his life and actually worth something. Also, he's not a school boy anymore to be treated food by his hyung. He can definitely pay for himself.

Junhoe almost frowned, but the delicious ramyeon scent made all his grunting disappear. Until he inhaled it he didn't even realized he was craving for food that much.

Junhoe loudly slurped the soup, stuffed his mouth with noodles and rolled his eyes out of ecstasy, feeling the warm spreading all over his body, even though he hasn't felt cold at all.

_Amazing night food, the guy I've been chasing for so freaking long is sitting in front of me on our date! If someone wakes me up now and tells me this was all just a dream, I'm wiping him off the face of the earth and annihilating Morfeus._

Oh, he probably swallowed on his food too fast – he might choke and embarass himself in front of his hyung; Junhoe quickly pulled away sticks and glanced at Jinhwan, but he seemed to daze a bit off and not noticing his strange moves.

Huh... Looked like his hyung totally melted away from the warm cafe and noodles. Well, if you think about it, he probably had a lot of stuff to deal today. With Shiyeon, and with Junhoe himself. He probably should suggest Jinhwan going home and take some sleep – but for some selfish reasons Junhoe didn't want to voice it at all. Junhoe wasn't only craving for tasty cheap food, but for talking with always-slipping-away hyung as well, for dates that would make his heart tremble with feelings, for his own crush that finally was out and celebrated.

That's why what he said was different:

"I wouldn't mind you sleeping right now at all. After all, wouldn't that mean that I've got to see you for quite a long time, even though you'd be sleeping? I bet you look like a fairy in your sleep, remember that time when you was called a fairy by your teammates when you did the fairytale escaping at my questroom?" he smiled widely, remembering that day with excitement: those overheard words made him stare at Jinhwan's picture with his teammates after succesfully winning the game and making a statement that yes, Jinhwan could be really described as "girly" or "fairy". And as Junhoe himself would describe Jinhwan, "undeniably damn attractive".

Junhoe shoved in his mouth one more portion of noodles, carefully stirring the sauce in his bowl.

"Oh, I know! Then tell me your address, hyung, so I could guide you home if you actually will unexpectedly fall asleep", Junhoe laughed loudly, "Or would you prefer me picking you up over my shoulder and carry you home while you sleep? I can do that, don't worry! You don't really seem heavy."

Making a use of the moment when no one looked at them being busy with their own meals, Junhoe squeezed Jinhwan's hand back, smiling to his eyes. Hyung didn't find his joke funny, though, and decided to turn conversation into a different way.

"To be honest, I realized that long time ago. That you have an interest in me, I mean. It's just... As if I was struck with lightning when I saw you and her together at the club".

Junhoe felt ashamed. Well, no, he actually did everything to make it obvious that he was hitting on Jinhwan but to have actual confirmation after the year of total ignore (and now it was clear to him that it _was_ an ignore) was somewhat...humiliating.

Especially for him, who has never hit on anyone before.

Junhoe went sour and licked the salty end of his sticks in wistfulness.

"So that means...did you and Shiyeon really dated, then?"

He looked up on Jinhwan's quite red cheek and shaked his head, being amazed.

"I had no freaking idea! She hit you kinda hard...well, I can understand her: to know that her ex-boyfriend likes they guy she's just invited on a date? I'd immediately tear off everyone's head if I was her! But I kinda was on the other side of the drama play".

Junhoe chuckled and tuned his voice down, just not to attract unwanted attention for once. Well, he never had a problem with having an interest in girls and guys – he didn't even know when he realized that he liked both sides. He just lived as he lived and...didn't give a single fuck? This's how you'd call it?

Everyone's been telling him that he's handsome and charismatic – in school, colledge, work, family relatives, he's been approached by girls and admired by guys, so Junhoe would just hanging out with anyone he liked back, exploring different kind of relationships, not really bragging about it to his parents, obviously (well, he hoped he hadn't really been bragging a lot about his relatioships, still his big mouth was usually something that should've been taken care of). Junhoe, as his father, wasn't religious, and his mom couldn't pushed him into a religion her family followed: dad has stated that his son should grow up first and only then choose his own way.

Well, that's how Junhoe lived – choosing his own Koo way! And this way has lead to Jinhwan, so Junhoe, listening to his stubborn heart, decided that Jinhwan was one of a great choice.

But he still should be careful, he didn't want to put he and Jinhwan-hyung into any kind of trouble.

"Was I really annoying then? If you say I was that much obvious..." Junhoe asked and coughed in his fist, embarassed. "Frankly, it's hard for me to let go of my goal. But that night I thought – that's it! I should stop chasing unreachable, I should just take the defeat with my head up. Ha, and you probably saw that too? That's why you decided to make a move? So used to me around you, huh?"

Junhoe took a michiefous glance on his hyung.

"If that's the case, you should probably start banging your head on that table, because if you hadn't approached me I'd give up and flirted with you no more! And now we're dating! It's funny how the tables could've turned? And you, hyung, you were...uh... well, I definitely wasn't expecting _that_ kind of a sign that I gave up too early! But I'm happy. You can even imagine how happy I am, even if I have that resting bitch face as I've been constantly told!"

Junhoe smiled happily, squeesing good sticks in his fists. Damn, seemed like he made a fool of himself, again, he broke into that hurried chaotic speech that always ruined his image of a cool wordless guy. But he couldn't act like it in front of Jinhwan, he just couldn't! The coolest guy here is definitely the one and only Kim Jinhwan, could Junhoe be even cooler than him?

Also, if he got a permission to date the guy after a year, he better show this dumb side of his right away, so it won't stab him in the back when he wouldn't want to. And now he will control it.

Well, he will certainly try to.

But how Junhoe possibly could control himself when he couldn't take his eyes away from Jinhwan who was sitting so close with his playful sleepy look and small delicate fingers that put food in his mouth?

Junhoe suppressed the urge to confess to the guy right now – but, first of all, Jinhwan already knew about his crush on him, to his own embarassment, shame and broken pride, and second of all, Junhoe was never really able to say those words aloud, even to girls, and definitely not to the almost-asleep hyung in the middle of a chaotic first night date.

Junhoe secretly reached out to Jinhwan, to fix a strand of hair that sticked out of place – but obeying the sudden wish, he tousled hyung's hair, to make more of a mess. With his ruffled hair (very soft, like as if everything that belonged to this miniature guy had to be soft) Jinhwan became even cuter – and even closer to Junhoe. And his heart skipped a beat again, it's weird how it didn't stop completely yet, after all this night.

_I'll reserve these words for later. I hope I'll have more opportunities to tell Jinhwan that I really lose my mind because of him. And if I won't have them – I'll make one!_

 

//

 

Jinhwan didn't like when he was being critisised for his height, he didn't like it as a joke, or as a bullying, or anything like that. It was the topic that hurt him the most, ruined his mood and made him disappointed in people.

Jinhwan was really bothered that everyone liked to mock his appearance and he thought that anyone gets it better, even Junhoe wasn't probably joked on as much for his slightly non-standard face features or weird laugh of a sneezing monkey... That's why he woke up a bit when he heard Junhoe calling him "fairy".

It sounded like an offence, not as something cute. Yeah, the dongsaeng had the reason and was reffering the game he played, but still it hurt.

The best he could do was to keep silence and look down and swallow unreasonable for any other person offence, try to enjoy the ramyeon and the rest of his date that he was to blafe for in the first place.

For his luckiness, Junhoe wasn't an idiot and he didn't repeat his questions when it became obvious that Jinhwan wasn't going to give answers right now.

Jinhwan didn't want to tell the younger one where he lived, because he simply was too uncomfortable with this. He wasn't dumb himself and he saw in the way Junhoe behaved, in his manners and in the thickness of his wallet that Junhoe was definitely from quite a rich family. And Jinhwan lived almost in the outskirts in Seoul, in goshiwon without any actual furniture, rented from a harmless ajumma, as old as the house itself, and he also slept on the floor... And his looks and his genetical playful behaviour could make anyone think that he dates only rich ones because of their money and luxury. That's definitely wasn't the case, he was seeking for a moral comfort, if he's lucky then physical comfort as well, if he's _really_ lucky – he would find a comfort in all ways he needed.

But still, talking about his ex-girlfriend dropped the mood for both of them. Jinhwan unconsciously rubbed his cheek again and stirred the ramyeon to win few seconds and come up with somewhat decent answer.

"Yeah, we dated, but enough time ago... we broke up on a pretty bad terms, and if it wasn't here back then with you, I wouldn't interrupt you at all. I don't like messing up people's dates, seriously, but I couldn't let you walk into the put I once falled in", he took a pause and then smiled. "Hey, it wasn't a drama play..."

He then took a much longer pause, to listen to all the words that were falling out of younger's big mouth.

Junhoe was noisy, absolutely noisy, he attracted a lot of attention and obviously loved it. This was the large difference between them, because Jinhwan just wanted to be noticed, appreciated and not being mocked, and the unwanted attention freaked him out. But if their relationship will succeed and he will resign himself, accept it and, well, maybe a miracle will happen, will love Junhoe back, they will become a good addition to each other – noisy Junhoe and Jinhwan's quiet koala personality.

So he fixed himself to eat, sometimes look up on his dongsaeng and try to follow everything he said. That was so weird. All the time Jinhwan knew him, he would describe Junhoe as a "coldblood prince", maybe, like "that cool guy in school" that by all laws should've been the one who all girls and gays in school were having a crush on. And now he was seeing a rather hot thempered and easy going guy. Ice prince got all his locks broken? Or was this "friendly" behaviour also just an image to him?

Seemed like Jinhwan was starting to get confused where's the truth. Was Junhoe's behaviour changing depending on how close he is with the person? That was reasonable, but, again, the change was too huge. Was Jinhwan looking at his real self right now, simple, sincere and emotional, or was Junhoe just trying to mess with him so he'd get relax and drop his guard?

Jinhwan had no idea how Junhoe was hunting his crushes down. But...

That jump he made to protect Jinhwan from slapping, that kiss in the dark sideway, it was so desperate that it couldn't have been played for the fun. Mostly because the situation wasn't typical at all.

"So are you saying that... you would really leave it all? You would just gave up on me?"

_Oh God, Junhwan, you are really an idiot! I forced dongsaeng into dating me the last second just because I wanted to get a revenge on my ex-girlfriend! Without that, he would just break up with her later on his own terms, we would be living separately in our own worlds and I wouldn't be lying to him right now, wouldn't feel so guilty, I wouldn't make him feel it as well. Junhoe falled in love, that's the thing, but what if I won't be able to get used to him? What if I won't be able to love him back?.._

The upset look was probably written all over his face, but if he's lucky, Junhoe will think it's all because of worrying about how Jinhwan should've "make it mutual" way before this day.

"Sorry, I just...I'm always missing the right time."

He let his breath out slowly, praising himself for not telling out much, and then he looked up again, in surprise. He could tell Junhoe was having the time of his life making the mess out of his hair.

"Aish, you child, why make a nest for the sparrows out of my head? Better finish your ramyeon while it still didn't become cold."

He finished his meal way before Junhoe, despite having a clearly smaller mouth. But while dongsaeng kept himself silent busy eating, Jinhwan sobered up once and for all, still wanting to sleep though.

Well, he ate today, became completely broke with no money at all, but he was actually satisfied with his life and ready to take an action, so he pulled out his phone from the jeans and unblocked him, looking up on Junhoe.

"Will you give me your phone number? I'll text you later. Or call."

Usually he didn't get phone number easily, especially girls' numbers, but now he really was taken aback by the enthusiasm that flinched in his dongsaeng's eyes who has already tried to get his number endless times. Well, Jinhwan believed that phone number was something personal, like a symbol of trust, that he's not indifferent to the person and ready to invite him into his life. And if Jinhwan put himself into this deception of "mutual feelings", he should at least demonstrate it.

"Don't worry, I'm not a girl – that's one, I'm not a girl that takes a phone, promises to call back and never does – that's two. I will name you as... «The Leaning Tower»".

Jinhwan smiled widely, saved the contact and glanced at Junhoe, realising that the guy hasn't understood why he was given such a weird nickname so soon.

"If you're done eating, I'll show you why I named you like this. Let's go".

Now Jinhwan smiled mischievously, stood up, walked towards and out of the door, with the mild pace, like he wasn't going to do anything.

_My Lord, why am I so unlucky? Why did I had to drown in this lie? Junhoe would be so hurt if I tell him the truth, with every time we see each other he may possibly get hurt even more, but I don't want to hurt him. He doesn't deserve it. Forgive me Father, for I'm a sinner, I just want him to be happy. Even if it means I have to do it this way._

He looked right and left on the road where he stopped by the red light, turned back to the dongsaeng, light smile on his lips. Jinhwan put his hands on Junhoe's shoulder and looked calmly into his eyes.

"And now let me explain. I'm an architect and I really like old buildings, especially towers. You ask, why are you The Leaning Tower?"

Jinhwan put his hand on the back of Junhoe's neck, pulled the younger down to himself, making him lower his head, and briefly kissed him, realising that his still small voice is screaming inside.

"Because you _lean_ ".

That Jinhwan added with the almost inaudible whisper, almost intimate whisper into Junhoe's lips, then he let him go and on the last seconds of a green light he ran across the road, thanking that driving by cars won't let Junhoe follow him.

Jinhwan tried to dissolve into the subway's crowd and go home as quickly as possible. He got too many emotions and memories making a chaos in his head, and he was afraid of being tangled in his lie. He needed time and a proper vision of what he'd done, what it will make for both of them and what should he do now.

Despite the crowd on the platform, the subway car was almost empty, but Jinhwan didn't want to sit down. He stood up, being glued to the handrail and not being able to throw the moments of this day out of his mind. Especially that moment when Junhoe suddenly hugged him from the back on the street. Jinhwan wasn't able to stop thinking about the tickling breath in his hair and the feeling of warm arms all wrapped around him.

And, honestly, it drove him crazy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first episode has ended!
> 
> In the next episode:  
> Junhoe (not embellishing) fears heights and amusement parks to _death_. But he and Jinhwan just started dating, and, of course, he has nothing else but to agree on going on this dangerous date...
> 
> I promise, there'll be less drama. Well, khm, but there certainly will be more funny and shipping moments...=)


	4. [for the lost and brave] Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Junhoe (not embellishing) fears heights and amusement parks to death. But he and Jinhwan just started dating, and, of course, he has nothing else but to agree on going on this dangerous date.
> 
> Feeling adrenaline – is a great reason to grab onto his hyung's arm, but will Junhoe survive this day? And how much of his pride is going to get hurt, considering spending whole day on the scaring "amusement" mechanisms under the observant eye of his love crush?

Jinhwan never thought that it could be so hard to type just one little message. He never had troubles connecting and communicating with people, he was never scared to make phone calls, but he still hasn't sent even one text to the person who he has been (arguable) dating whole week with, and he was haunted by remorse. He lied to his dongsaeng and now he kept ignoring him... probably that's what Junhoe's thought about him, that Jinhwan was ignoring him, because he hasn't called or texted him after their spontaneous first date.

And he hasn't left his own number, too...

It's true, that Jinhwan hasn't really intended to build this relationship between him and Junhoe in the first place, but still.

He still hasn't been able to forget the warm backhugs, the breath touching his hair, those crazy kisses that they claimed each other with.

Jinhwan was sitting on a wooden floor in his flat, leaning against the wall and staring at the black screen of the phone in his hands. He must do something. He should end it, once and for all, by telling Junhoe the truth, or he should just keep playing his role.

He thought it'd be easy. But now he realised: there will be nothing "easy" about it.

Deep sigh.

Jinhwan unblocked the screen, picked the last added contact, opened the empty chat and froze, not sure of what to say. Even simple "hi" should be enough. But.

Screen started to go dark again, annoyed by Jinhwan's standstill, and he hurriedly swifted over the "Leaning Tower" title at the top of the screen, squinted his eyes for a couple of seconds and quickly typed right away:

 

**«Hey it's Jinhwan. If you want to go on a date with me, I'll be waiting at the amusement park in 3pm»**

 

He sent it and dropped his phone, hands pressed to his face. He quietly (and a bit hysterically) laughed and looked out of the window, with another deep sigh.

Now he had no way back. And when they'll meet, Jinhwan will have to explain why he hasn't texted Junhoe anything, nothing, even not to exchange numbers. Even if he would've been busy, he still "could find" the time to do something as small and simple as this.

He lied on a floor with his arms outstretched, staring at the ceiling and smiling sadly. Well, he sure meant it when he sent the message, he hasn't thought twice about what to text Junhoe once he started typing. This could've mean that he didn't want to tell him the truth, could've mean that he actually wanted to date his dongsaeng. But there was this fog in his mind and heart that he just couldn't deal with.

_It's a one-hour trip to the park. I should get myself up._

He sat, barely wanting to be standing, got on his knees, reached to the silver cross under his t-shirt and took it out, held between his palms and closed his eyes for a couple of seconds, asking quietly:

"Should I really walk this path? Is the turn that I took – the right one? Lord, help me cope with all of this and find the peace of mind."

Jinhwan crossed himself, kissed the cross and stood up to get himself ready for the date. Sadly, his father made sure that religion was deeply scribbled into his soul, to the point when he still remembered and read the prayers, went at church sometimes and flinched when life made him do something that went against his beliefs and his religion.

It is hard, to be at odds with yourself. And Junhoe was one of the reasons Jinhwan had such complicated inner fights. That jerk.

Ten to three, he walked up to the amusement park gates and looked around. There was a lot of people, since it was a weekend, and it was quite hard for someone with his height to look for someone. He could even get a mocking glare or two.

Jinhwan took out his phone, checking if there were new messages, but the chat remained empty. That left him unsettling.

Minutes were going, he even started passing here and there in front of the gates, looking around, trying to spot his new boyfriend.

His boyfriend.

Jinhwan still couldn't say it out loud even in his thoughts. He still didn't believe that it was real, that this game of his was becoming a reality.

_That's the weirdest start of a relationship I've ever had. Well, if it can be called a relationship._

He started to feel lonely, so he took himself to the shadow under some trees with the park's map he took for free, sometimes he would look up, but no tall figure has shown up yet.

It's surprising how long fifteen minutes of waiting for Junhoe felt to him, just like a little eternity of Jinhwan losing his mind to the worries. He put down the map he was boringly reading, and looked up to the sky peeking through the trees' crowns, smirking to himself.

_Maybe I should confess to myself that I do want to meet him, after all, and I'm all worked up now that he's late. Maybe he's late because of traffic jams or he simply met someone that endured him in a small talk. Still, here I am, slowly going crazy._

_It'd be great if it is the case. Then, it wouldn't be just my game and my endless lie._

_I...would've I been happy if I really fell in love with Junhoe?_

_I think... yes, I would._

//

 

The evening, the morning and the next five days were the hardest days Junhoe ever had in his life.

He has been waiting for a call or a text from Jinhwan, not simply because he wanted to save his number too, but because getting something would actually mean that he and hyung really got this close.

But looks like it was too early to celebrate his win over the suffocatingly long and unrequited love crush.

When Junhoe came home after the sudden goodbye on a crossroad that marked the end of his first private meeting with Jinhwan, he kept lying on a bed with his phone until he accidentaly got asleep despite the boiling emotions in his heart.

He hasn't put his phone down at the breakfast as well, getting scolded by his father for the constand sidelooks; on his work Junhoe also tried to keep the phone closer to monitor and stared at him almost the same amount of time that he looked at the players on the webcams.

But the phone remained silent. Junhoe even checked his smartphone network – everything worked, to his endless disappointment. It's just Jinhwan hasn't sent him anything yet.

_Maybe it was all a dream? I know I got wasted really bad a couple of times that I couldn't remember anything later, but to confuse my fantasies with the reality...I don't know..._

Well, yes, it was very easy to think it was all a cloud castle he built in his mind, because, really, does the stuff like that night at the club even happens in real life?

The more hours without a message or a call were gone by, the clearer was the answer. The phone hasn't been dead the whole time, no, Junhoe still got texts from people he knew, offering to go eat somewhere; group chats still annoyed him with popups and he even got a couple of shy texts from an unknown girl that somehow got his number after visiting their questroom.

But no message has been sent by Jinhwan, and with every hour, with every day Junhoe got gloomier. He started to put away his phone (not losing any hope but tired of waiting and flinching every ten seconds), pursued his lips, scaring people away with the usual cold aura of his.

While there's been no good news about Jinhwan, Junhoe busied himself with thinking about the nickname he was unexpectedly given by hyung. "The Leaning Tower". What a nickname!

Junhoe has never been called like this before. He wasn't even that tall, to be called a tower, you know?

"Leaning". Junhoe secretly smirked, touching his lips with his knuckles. When Jinhwan defined him like this, so confidently, forcing him lean for his sudden kiss – that's when Junhoe got completely head over heels with the guy. It's just like there was no room left for more feelings towards Jinhwan – Junhoe felt like he could just blow up from a single emotion added to what he felt at the moment. The shock from the said words and Jinhwan's unexpected leaving saved him from blowing up, probably.

But now he started remembering everything again, in details: the hand on his nape, pressing gently but firmly, making him lower his head; the soft touch on the lips and insinuating voice that tricky Jinhwan probably lowered, especially for him. _The Leaning Tower. You_ , somewhat intimate, almost overlapped by the street noise, said so quetly that only he could hear – and Junhoe shook himself up, rubbing the sudden warm shiver on his neck.

Masking the stupid smile on his lips with the careless tone of voice and poker face, Junhoe excused himself from the operator's room, telling his coworker Yunhyeong he need to go to the toilet.

But making himself alone was a mistake. The sadness that was briefly pushed away with the remaining memories, clouded over him again, getting heavy on his shoulders.

Maybe, because except for these memories of the nickname and the night at the club Junhoe got nothing else left.

It's been a week, and Jinhwan still hasn't texted him. And, well, Junhoe was really determined in what he believed in, but he wasn't an idiot.

It means, hyung doesn't need him now. Or he never needed him in the first place – if he still hasn't called after he got Junhoe's number.

_But he swore he wasn't like this! He promised me he wouldn't leave me hanging!_

Maybe, it was to cool his disbelief off, to make him trust and let Jinhwan go. Otherwise Junhoe'd definitely get his number back, no matter what excuses.

_Ugh...it really pisses me off! But we always accidentaly bump into each other in our lives, and we will again. And if I have no patience left, I can go to my dad's work and make him tell me what department Kim Jinhwan works. Yeah, right. That's what I'm gonna do in Monday!_

_I asked him to give me his honest answer – yes or no, why is he pulling my strings like this? Like he's trying to torture me. Or test me. Why testing me? I'll go and pin him to the wall again for the proper answer. Ugh, hyung, such a piss of, why won't you text or call me?!_

Junhoe angrily sighed, once again, being tormented by the feelings he couldn't express. He wanted to do something, so after he went to the toilet he proceeded to the main room, changing places with another coworker, who was an administrator, just so he could meet new clients and explain rules to them in order to forget about Jinhwan for a while.

Another game started in 14:30, so Junhoe reluctantly walked back to the operator's room, too small for him and his present feelings.

"Your phone is ringing off the hook, when are you going to change the sim-card so you won't get that bombarded by your fangirls?" Yunhyeong jokingly looked at him. Junhoe rolled his eyes and tapped twice with the resisting fingers on the screen.

Among a dozen of texts Junhoe saw the one that instantly grabbed his attention:

 

**[Hey it's Jinhwan...]**

 

He quickly grabbed his phone, almost dropping it in order to unblock it as fast as possible. He got the text but he missed it, being submerged into his despair, why did hyung always loved to appear at such moments of Junhoe's life?!

The message said he has a date at 3pm.

Junhoe let out an inhuman growl, scaring his colleague.

"Yunhyeong, can you monitor my game instead of me?!"

He turned around, looking at Junhoe with surprise. "It's almost started though! I'm monitoring my own game."

Junhoe pressed his hands together in somewhat pleasing gesture (almost a humiliation for his personality) and then grabbed Yunhyeong by shoulder, violently not letting him concentrate on his own players.

"It's a matter of life and death! I'll treat you food, I mean it! And...alright, I'm taking your tomorrow's evening shift! I promise. I know it's all too sudden. But it's a matter of life and death! Yunhyeong! You could be my savior! My hero!"

"What a drama queen", laughing Yunhyeong shrugged him off, being flattered and almost coaxed into the deal. "What's that, a burning house or a failing date? Okay, fine, go. Don't forget to treat me food later."

And Junhoe already got his cap on and stormed out of the room.

  
He was really afraid to be late. He's been ignoring his phone all day and he got the text too late. The clock on the building in the horizon already showed 15:01, and Junhoe tried to keep his calm.

He ran towards the entrance and looked around failing to find any familiar figure. The disappointment and anger almost crushed at him again, but he turned around once more and finally noticed a familiar face peeking under the panama hat.

"Actually, how early you came here that you decided you want to...read a map?" Feeling guilty, Junhoe called out to Jinhwan, catching his breath and clutching onto his phone, only now realized he could've texted Jinhwan or called him to make sure they would meet, but he was in such a hurry and worry to come to the date that he just hadn't time to think about anything else.

And he should've given some more thoughts to everything, though, because now Junhoe started to realise some unpleasant things...like the fact that Jinhwan suggested them going on a date to the _amusement park_. The mortal enemy of Koo Junhoe.

Well, not the mortal-mortal enemy, but more like...anyway, he never approached the place closer than one kilometer away, despite the excited reviews and jokes from his classmates and groupmates in college. And...uuufff... Now he didn't see the safe way out of it...cuz Jinhwan...

Junhoe blinked, trying to take his eyes off the ominously floating (on an impossible height!) ferris wheel's cabins and rushing somewhere between the trees (with an impossible speed!) roller coaster cars, and he smiled, confusedly, to somehow not bothered at all by such a threating place Jinhwan. More like the hyung was eagerly excited to be here.

Junhoe swallowed.

"How about we take an icecream first? My treat!" he suggested with stable and brave voice he was proud to have at the moment, walking towards the ticket window. As soon as he got two tickets, he lead Jinhwan along the roads, noticing all the threats he could possibly meet on the date, until they bumped into the snacks.

Delaying the moment when his hyung would want to ride something, Junhoe set himself to buying all the snacks he saw and succesfully talking Jinhwan into every silly talk and topic he could think of.

Nervously putting a piece of a caramel apple in his mouth, Junhoe decided that he's done being a coward and he needed to survive the date through anyway. But he really didn't want to show the coward side of his, that was scared of heights and amusement parks, to Jinhwan. He'd better not! He'd better die.

Well, considering it was one of the "coolest" amusement parks in Busan with its own "haunted house" with ghosts, Junhoe really hoped he would get lucky not to actually die today.

"How about...we start with the ferris wheel?" Junhoe carefully threw the safest in his opinion suggestion into their talk.

He could close his eyes on the ferris wheel and imagine that he wasn't actually moving anywhere up. The floor in the cabins just needed not to be transparent, and that will make him safe and satisfied with this option.

Junhoe looked at Jinhwan again – rare occasion today, he usually spent all their short time together not being able to take his eyes off him, but now he constantly looked up, seeing off with an empty stare another ride that they've walked past.

_Please, hyung, say yes to the ferris wheel!_

//

 

Jinhwan actually felt relieved, now that Junhoe was finally here. He was surprised and disappointed to see that Junhoe hasn't responded to the text he sent, at all. Probably, if dongsaeng hasn't shown up, he'd end up calling him to make sure he got rejected and...he'd probably feel sad.

But now he was looking at Junhoe, somehow realising that all the nervousness he had has gone away. Junhoe came to him, so they were okay.

Jinhwan was waiting for the "why did you wait a whole week to text me?" question, but there was none. Seems like the younger one anticipated their date so much that he didn't care what took Jinhwan so long. Like a kid, Junhoe was looking at the roller coasters behind the walls of the park – probably filled with excitement, Jinhwan was too short to see. But he didn't even had to call to him, Junhoe somehow managed to remember that he came here on a date with Jinhwan (that means, he wasn't supposed to act like he's here on his own).

And Junhoe's got both of their tickets, determined to pay back for the night ramen snack they had last time. Jinhwan had to come to terms with this, as with the fact that Junhoe stubbornly kept walking around the food place, like they've come here just to eat, not to have fun.

Jinhwan was patient, very patient, he watched the dongsaeng with the tender smile, waiting for the moment when it would dawn on Junhoe that they need to take some rides, even though he already chose a cool roller coaster for them to ride, and a couple of other exciting things that he really wanted to try. Also, he saw that hunted house on a map before, that was really a must-go! It was hard in Busan to find a truly scary place, but he's heard that the abovementioned house was really scary. Like, _really_. And Jinhwan was eager to get some adrenalin for the next week of constant work.

Finally he heard the suggestion from Junhoe to go inspect further into the amusement park. Jinhwan wasn't tired of Junhoe's talking, not at all, he wasn't bored or anything. It's just he was too afraid that at some point of talking the nice mood of their date would break when he'll get asked the question: "So what took you so long to text me?". So he was relieved to hear that they are going to actually ride something.

Though, it was a weird choice of Junhoe's.

_The ferris wheel?_

By all laws of proper dates in amusement parks, a couple should definitely go up to see the city on a ferris wheel. But the small cabine is a place for talks, private talks, maybe kisses. A place with one hundred percent certainty that no one would hear them, that no one would be there but them two. It was not the right time yet.

That's why Jinhwan gave a thought a second or two, but shook his head and took out the map from his pocket.

"Nah, we better go there later, when we are completely tired from other things. Let's go to the Storm first, it's right here. And we should definitely go to this roller coaster! And that haunted house, I really want to try it."

Jinhwan smiled widely, folded the mad and put it back to his pocket, took Junhoe by hand and lead him through the crowd to the Storm. Something crossed his mind and he squeesed dongsaeng's hand, briefly looking back and adding:

"Besides, it's better to go to the ferris wheel when it's dark, you know? The view would be better at night, especially because there's a glass floor in the cabins there. But anyway, we need to blow our minds with the Storm first! Let's go!"

He didn't see or hear the response from Junhoe, but he bet the dongsaeng was as excited as he was right now. They were going to have a lot of fun! Jinhwan always loved amusement parks, even if he rarely had someone to go here nowadays.

Their date was promising.

//

Junhoe was doomed. Completely. And utterly. **Doomed.**


End file.
